Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Self....stuff

So yeah. Who's the most important person in thy life? I'll give thee some space to answer.... (don't write on thy screen)








....well, if thou paid any attention whatsoever to the title, thou wouldst certainly have answered "Me!" Now, what do we as humans typically do with people who are important in our lives? (that question was more rhetorical - I'm going to answer it myself right now) We get to know the person better.

There are tons of different levels of self-knowledge and self-awareness that it's hard to know where to begin. Anyway, something that I've come to realize after long periods of stress and then lack thereof, is that the latter often comes from self-knowledge. Essentially, you have to know what you want, because only then can you have a chance of getting it. (I'm kinda wondering if it's proper to use "you" for referring to people in general... French uses "on" which conjugates like "he" and means "we"... hrmm.... this is a toughy... leave a comment if you've studied old languages)

Now, this will sound really dumb, but (going by the earlier logic) the best way to get to know somebody is to talk to him or her. Thus, I am suggesting with 100% seriousness that thee set aside some time, specifically designated to learning about the wonderful and amazing person that thou art. (teehee, i'm loving the thou and thee and thy and..... yeah)

There are a few ways to do this, although they are all basically the same thing. I'm almost suggesting a kind of self-meditation, except to keep things casual, with this person thou probably doesn't know very much about (although thou hast probably seen a him or her quite a lot) thou shouldst just stick to normal conversation. Naturally, thou'll want to be alone with thyself, because intimate conversations are not normally something had when other people are around.

I've found that the best way to be alone with yourself is to go for a walk. Snow is great for this, as the coldness is isolating. Once thou'rt (does that work?) alone with thyself, just start talking. Hold an entire conversation with thyself, however thou wantst. If this seems weird... well...

...based on the standards of today's society, it is weird, so accept that and get back to the conversation. Ask thyself what thee wantst to accomplish, and try to understand what things thou art basing thy happiness on. Re-evaluate these values - is this what thou wantst to base everything off of?

The more thou talkst to thyself, the easier it will become and the more thou willst be able to learn. It is healthy (in my opinion) to have regular conversations with yourself. I do it, and I find myself to generally be extremely happy. Even when I'm not, I'm still hanging out with one of my best friends, and that makes up for it. =D

Monday, December 3, 2007

Boys, Girls, and Snow

Much as I would love to be studying for exams right now, I believe my blog takes preference, as I didn't write on it for the entire month of November. This is horrible!

Well. Clearly I've been keeping myself busy... although I'm sure there are more, here are some of the things I've done lately:

  • considered (and intended) to use the proper second-person singular pronoun in everyday speech, just for uniqueness and random fun
  • considered (and intended) to try speaking E-Prime for awhile (same reasons as above, and also just to see if I could do it)
  • spent far too much time on wikipedia, coming up with things like this
  • added more things to my to-do list than taken off... basically as a result of having a fair bit of free time, but not feeling like I have any. thus, I see something cool, and go "oh. i'll do that later when I have time". Hopefully I'll get most of them done over Christmas break
  • finished up a musical and theatrical production "The Pajama Game", with my role as Hines (leave a comment if you would like to purchase a DVD of the performance)
  • made more pipecleaner bracelets (comment if you want to purchase one of those too haha)
  • had a blissful epiphany (last Wednesday)
  • and many other things.....

Regarding the actual title of this post, it's just about the nature of guys and girls. It snowed here, for most of today (and I'm absolutely thrilled, because I love snow) so tonight, all of the senior guys were tossing (and dragging) their favorite girls into the snow. It amuses me greatly, because the girls are complaining, but they're the ones who come downstairs and tease the guys enough to be tossed in. This isn't irony on their part, or stupidity, it's based around the false assumption that girls dislike everything they complain about.

Simply, this is not the case - girls often complain just as much or more about things that they actually enjoy greatly. This is because if they made it seem like they wanted to be tossed in, they wouldn't be, and that would be no fun at all. Girls would be tossed in three times, complain after each one, and go back for more, because every time is like a trophy. It shows that shes attracts the males enough for them to want to toss her into the snow.

I could rant for hours about this sort of thing, I really could, but I've gotta get some sleep now, because I have exams this week (although mostly easy ones).

Also, just moments ago, I just had a genius idea! The ability to read and leave comments directly from a feed reader.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Holidays and Multiculturalism

Ok, so, today a little bird (duck, to be precise) told me of a school where people aren't allowed to talk about Christmas. Or Halloween. This is because the school has people of other races/religions/cultures, and doesn't want to offend them by imposing santa or jack-o-lanterns upon them.

I'm sorry, but I personally believe this to be quite ridiculous. These people have come to live in Canada, and (like it or not) Christmas and Halloween are part of Canadian society, and our culture.

Imagine if I was to visit a foreign place, and the locals immediatly stopped performing any sort of holidays or customs that they would typically doing. I would be shocked and offended! While I will admit that this doesn't hold exactly the same slant for consumerist things like Halloween and Christmas, there is no reason for us to inhibit our own culture on the basis of those who enter our country.

Speaking of consumerism, however, perhaps we should halt Christmas and Halloween for other reasons.... ;-)

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Running, Antisociality, and Manipulation

So, I just went on a wonderful run, just now, at 10 in the evening. It was extremely dark, and I wasn't wearing glasses or contacts, so it was quite blurry as well. However, it was once of the most wonderful things ever, and certainly the happiest part of my day except perhaps for the shower I took post-run.

The strange thing is, I enjoyed it far more than I would have enjoyed my soccer practise that I had not gone to today. I instead involved myself with debating, because I simply was not in the mood to kick a ball around with a bunch of guys. The humorous thing is, under other circumstances I would have tried to escape debating by claiming I had soccer practise.

But in the end, I'm actually doubting that I like either of them a lot. Part of it comes down to antisociality - that I would rather just think by myself than debate or go running by myself than play soccer - because sometimes I just don't want to have to deal with other people. The other aspect, however, is that I dislike being told that I have to do something.

This is what bothers me most about debating. I joined it last year, and since then I have been convinced to go to tournament after tournament, and don't get me wrong, I do enjoy them when I'm there, but they use up my weekends and I feel manipulated because I didnt want to go in the first place. The thing is, I essentially have to go to debating, and I'm not sure why. Basically, my debating coach, Mr. Castro, would be quasi-furious at me if I quit debating, and would definitely guilt-trip me so much that I might end up going back.

This bothers me. For instance, I have dance class on Wednesday nights and Friday afternoons, but I have to miss all of the Friday ones because they're at the same time as debating. Now, as wonderful a skill as debating may be, it does not have nearly as much intrinsic joy as dancing. Also, as attractive as some of the female debaters at the other schools may be, dancing is much more likely to get me involved with any girls.

So...
Who is grumpy if Malcolm doesnt go to debating? Mr. Castro.
Who is grumpy if Malcolm doesnt go to dance class? Malcolm.
Who chooses? Well, it would appear to be Mr. Castro, at the moment.

This is probably the only true reason I resent debating (Note that I'm obligated to go to soccer practise as well, although not nearly as forcefully). What life and society come down to - and this is actually a common point in debating - is choice. Here, it would appear that I have no choice. So, being human (most of the time) I want what I don't have. However, it seems as though what I don't have is a lack of debating, and not merely a choice between. Accordingly, I want out.

Thursday, September 27, 2007

Climate Change - a recipe for disaster

This afternoon, our school was visited by a journalist named Gwynne Dyer. He told us all sorts of amazing facts and implications of impending climate change, and it was actually rather scary, and overwhelming at the same time. So overwhelming, in fact, that I briefly considered suicide, just so that I wouldn't have to deal with the things that will be happening globally in just a few decades. I then realized that then the world would have one less human to feed, and chuckled for a moment.

But I don't intend to commit suicide, nor should you. This world can still survive, it will just take the co-operative effort of everyone. I'm considering forming some sort of youth organization.... perhaps like the AYACC (Active Youth Against Climate Change). I'm not really sure.

I just strongly believe that my generation has to be aware of all of the implications of climate change, or else there won't really be many of us left.

I'm not sure exactly where I'm going with this whole thing, so I guess I just want to tell everybody to throw out their incandescent lightbulbs, and stuff like that.

Also, vote for your national Green Party, because politics wouldn't matter if we weren't around to complain about it.

Thursday, September 13, 2007

Input and Output cannot be the same (Change requires Acceptance)

Alright. So. If you want to change something, then lets say the something you want to change is the input. Let's also say that whatever is going to result from this change will be the output.

Now. Imagine you're creating a machine that turns squares into circles. I'm not sure why you'd want this, but perhaps you have an obsession with round things. Maybe you hate corners. Whatever the case may be, you want to turn squares into circles. So, this machine has an input and an output. But what shapes should the input and output be?

Well, in a lot of the social 'machines' we see today, they would both be circles. Wait, what? That wouldn't make sense, because then how would you get a square into this machine in the first place? This machine would be useless, because there is nothing accomplished by making a circle become a circle.

Instead, the input should be a square. This may seem unbelievably obvious, but think of what trying to change a person is like, and how most people tend to go about it.

When we have ideals about how someone should be, we generally try to make them fit into those ideals. However, in order to be willing to change, s/he needs to feel accepted for who s/he already is. Unfortunately, when we try to change somebody, usually we start by expecting them to be the person we want them to be. This is ridiculous and unrealistic. A square cannot fit into a machine that has a circle for its input, and neither can a person welcome your suggestions until they are accepted into you.

You can't have your input and output be the same, or you will never do anything. You must be willing to let in someone that isn't perfect or you will never be able to appreciate anyone.

Sunday, September 2, 2007

Back to School

Life begins again.

My social life, that is. I had a great summer, all things considered, but except for one wedding, one birthday party, one camp, and one other thing, I didn't really do anything else this summer other than programming.

So I really can't wait to get back to school. I miss all of my friends because I haven't seen any of them in months. Hopefully this year I won't be pointlessly chasing pointless relationships, like I normally do during the school year. Ideally, I'll be able to focus more on friendships and the like. Those are my intentions, at any rate.

Also, recently, after writing a few nice songs, I've started coming up with random phrases and realizing that they would make great song titles:

  • Sink (Into My World)
  • Glad to be Alive (it could be worse)
  • Never Too Close
So at some point, I intend to actually write songs based on these ideas. I've realized that I actually have almost written enough songs to make an album. All that remains now is to come up with some music for them, and make recordings. With any luck, I may release an album by 2010.

Something else funny that I came up with at about 2am last night as Matthew and I finished the Parrsboro Website:

"The cup is neither half full nor half empty - its contents have achieved equilibrium with its lack thereof"

I have other ideas that I intend to post, but they won't make it online until I have time, and right now I really need to be packing for school.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

a sticky version of my bedside table

The other day, I looked up from my computer (yes really) and the wall behind my bedside table was glowing bright blue.... it looked really cool =) and so I drew a sketch of it on the only piece of paper that I had at my fingertips... a sticky-note!

That's it right there. You can't quite see how the wall was glowing, but I think it's a neat pic nonetheless. I may make more of the same sort of thing later.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Self-Referencial Aptitude Test

Based on a more complicated and more challenging test by Jim Propp, I have created an aptitude test of sorts where all of the answers reference the other questions. Mine was just an experiment, and it only has 5 questions, but I mostly just wanted to see if I could do it. Now, you get to see if you can do it! Have fun, and let me know if you have difficulties or discover that I made an error somewhere... the test:

1: The answer to question 3 is
(a) A
(b) B
(c) C
(d) D
(e) E

2: The only letter that is not one of the answers on this test is:
(a) C
(b) D
(c) E
(d) A
(e) B

3: This answer is (alphabetically) before the answer to question
(a) 2
(b) 1
(c) 5
(d) none of the above
(e) 4

4: The letters which appear before this question are (not necessarily in order):
(a) B, C
(b) B, D
(c) A, C
(d) D, E
(e) C, D

5: This answer is one character away from the answer to question
(a) 1
(b) 2
(c) 3
(d) 4
(e) none of the above

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Love etc

Earlier today, I had another one of those moments where I think of something so profound that I need to write it down. The thought was
"love is holding on even when you don't know the reason behind the tears"

In other news, some friends walked by while I was painting my roof (don't ask) and took a short clip of me which intends to end up on YouTube.

Also, I went to the wonderful beach of Cape Sharp this weekend, and arranged some stones and took a picture of them:

Tada!
Contact me if you want a higher resolution version for use as a desktop background or something....

One last tidbit of information that I found out today and thought was really interesting:
emotional means 'affected by an emotion' while emotive means 'drawing out or evoking emotion'

Tuesday, August 7, 2007

Back from Berwick

Ok, so I was off at a wonderful camp called Berwick for the last week, which (along with how intermittent my internet is at home (due to problems concerning wireless-N or lack thereof)) explains why I haven't posted in a long time.

Camp was great, it really was, even though it felt like it went by too quickly. I met tons of new friends, saw my old friends again, and I even managed to write 2 songs as well, one on friday night at about 2am (saturday morning technically) and the other in the car on the way home on Sunday. It was really funny, because midway through walking around composing the first song, I had a sort of "movie moment" and ran into Bruce Harding, the music leader at the camp

Both wonderful love songs, they will probably make me famous in the near future... =P
Actually, I do intend to find a way to publish some of my musical/lyrical works, but I'll need some sort of help for that (iTunes?) and I will also need to learn how to play guitar so that I can accompany myself when I sing them. Then I'm going to probably need some recording equipment slightly more complicated than I have now, but yeah, once I deal with those small things, I'll be famous!

I have almost an album's worth of songs I've written, but most of them are only really half-finished... =(

Also, something I said to myself this afternoon and decided to take note of because I liked it:
"having something really good happen to you is reason enough stop regretting past choices you've made, for they all led you to where you are now"

Ponder that!

Friday, July 20, 2007

Caramilk in the Microwave

My grandmother (paternal) is here for the weekend, and earlier today I was thinking about the scrumptious almond-bark treats she always made. She would bring a container of them, and it would tend to be about half-full by the time anybody other than me got to them. *burp*

So I was thinking about those, and wondering if there would be a way to create something similar with less effort and using the limited resources (just a microwave) that I have during the school year.

The result: a Caramilk bar - in the microwave

...when I informed the lady working at the convenience store what I intended to do with the chocolate bar, she laughed and suggested that I take the foil wrapper off first!

But yeah, in the end it wasn't actually that interesting... Once the bowl came out of the microwave, I stirred the chocolate and caramel together with a spoon, then put it into the freezer to solidify. Unfortunately, when I went back for it half an hour later, it had completely frozen, so (of course) I put it back in the microwave for a few seconds.

The final outcome was pretty good, sort of a chocolate taffy, but it wouldn't really be worth the effort to do it again. Maybe next time I'll use a different kind of chocolate bar...

Screwy Router

My router here at home is really acting up.... probably because my laptop uses wireless-N and the router is only designed to do B and G... but I'd still say there's a problem with it, because the internet just keeps dying for everybody. I think we're getting a new one soon, which is good, because the internet will constantly just die on me, or refuse to load pages in a browser (while instant messaging clients work fine...

So yeah, Matt and I have been going kinda wonky working on all sorts of new websites, but the Stikmen one is actually coming along quite nicely... It might actually be online sometime! :-O

I'm going to a camp in a week, which is gonna be awesome because I'll get to see a bunch of friends that I don't get to see during the rest of the year. It's always really fun.

but now I must sleep

.... I think that sometime later I'm going to upload some of the graphics I've made recently...

Monday, July 16, 2007

Something and Something Else

I really should be going to bed, seeing as its 1:48 A.M. as I start to write this, but my intelligence starts to become limited at this hour (actually, it doesn't, usually) and so I lose the logic that should send me to sleep.

Anyway, earlier this evening I was at Matt's house working on a Catering Website. We made a nice little image gallery using PHP. It's really awesome and left me feeling pretty pumped.

When I was walking home at almost midnight, something funny happened:

I saw a guy in the distance, and then we passed, including a conversation something like "hey" "hey, whats up?" "not much, you?" "I'm not too bad". Now, that wasn't funny, but then he turned around and he was like "wait... where are you from?" and I said "uhhh... here?" because I've lived in this little town for most of my life, except for the last year at school. He was like "hmmm... I don't know you..." and I didn't quite recognize him either. It wasn't until I introduced myself that he realized who I was and that I finally figured out who he was.

Despite the darkness, it's not often that you aren't recognized in a small town you've lived in all your life. I guess that just shows how much I changed over the course of the year...

Sunday, July 15, 2007

iGrok

well, I said I'd post something interesting here later, so I am:



...a little mock-up of the iPod ads and Stranger in a Strange Land (by Robert Heinlein). I made this in Photoshop 7 this evening.

Saturday, July 14, 2007

Haha wow

Malcolm has created his own blog. Woohoo.

Lol... I was just really bored today and kinda thought I'd make a blog so that when I felt like ranting about something, I wouldnt have to go bother one of my friends. If you want, you can check out the Stikmen Graphic Design Blog. Stikmen Graphic Design is a little web design company of which I make up half of hahaha.

Anyway... I'm an quasi-interesting teenager who comes up with lots of crazy-random thoughts, so I thought I'd make a blog so that the world could look at them or something? ...That was lame.

So yeah.... there it is... I'll type something actually interesting later haha.

By the way, the name of this blog was just me getting frustrated while trying to come up with a humorous name for my blog that somebody else hadn't thought of yet. (and let me tell you, it's not easy)

Later!